Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Walmart After Dark

What is it about Walmart?  I mean, we've all seen the "People of Walmart" email forwards.  In fact, they've actually made a website and a YouTube video (both of which are absolutely freaking hilarious) to poke fun at all the crazy sh*t that goes on in Walmarts around the country.

Tonight I had to go out to do my obligatory weekly shopping for things like milk, juice, mini-bagels, and lunchables.  45 minutes and 103 dollars later I was leaving the place shaking my head at all of the questionable situations I had just come across.  In 45 minutes!

The funny part is that less than 2 short years ago I worked at Walmart, and the funny stuff I saw didn't annoy me nearly as much as when I'm there as a customer.  Maybe it's because I was getting paid pennies to be there?  I don't know.  Alas, my employment at the *Rollback* capital of the world only lasted for 8 long months.  And I didn't mind it all that much, mostly because every once in a while I got to post stuff like this to my Facebook page:

But as a customer, I can't stand being in there after hours.  Sadly, the only time I get to go to Walmart (alone) is the time that I hate it the most; After Dark.  Something happens to that place when the sun goes down.  The crazies come out of the woodwork to aimlessly roam the aisle and pretend that they don't hear me saying, "excuse me," 47 times, let their babies walk through the place with no pants on, and take it upon themselves to sample the food, (and I'm not talking about the nice elderly man who gives out samples from his little cart on Saturdays... I'm talking about people who just open up any old thing on the shelves and try it out.)  Those were the highlights of my trip tonight. 

Oh, and no trip to Walmart would be complete without a picture so I'll leave you with this:

In case you can't make it my crappy night time phone picture, that's a rolled up dirty diaper in the parking space next to my car.  Nice, huh?  Really?  Cause finding a trash can would have been too inconvenient.

Oh, and seriously, if you haven't watched that YouTube video yet, and you have about 6 minutes to waste, you really should take a peek.  It's stupidly funny.  And you can't help but laugh.  At least I can't.

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