Thursday, November 4, 2010

A Lesson Learned

This is a warning to all the other mothers out there with a pair of fabric scissors, a spray bottle, and a fine toothed comb: Leave the hair-cutting to the professionals.  I feel so strongly about this that I shall rephrase for clarification:  Do not assume that because you have scissors you are qualified to be a hair stylist.  Kinda like how you may own a light bulb but are in no position to call yourself an electrician.

This picture may explain better than my words can:

I'm pretty sure it is time for me to hang up my scissors.  Or just put them back where they belong: in a craft drawer limited to cutting fabric, ribbon, paper, and other things that are not attached to the bodies of my children.  It was only 1 month ago that I came to terms with the fact that Olivia's inheritance of my ridiculously tall forehead had already made her predisposed for a life of having bangs.  I assisted my mother in cutting her hair that day, watching carefully so that I could follow up with the necessary bang-trims in the days, months, and years to come.

Obviously bored and feeling restless from this rainy weather we're experiencing, I decided it was time to get out the old spray bottle and scissors.  BAD decision.  I repeat: VERY BAD decision.  I couldn't get an even line so the bangs just got shorter and shorter and shorter until I realized they were like halfway up her forehead.  I didn't know what to do at that point, and there is a spot right in the middle of her head that is shorter than the rest but I knew if I didn't stop there I'd be in even more trouble.  More trouble?  As if that's possible.  But I did (thankfully) stop.  They are now an uneven hot mess of too-short bangs that don't even transition well to the longer hair in the back.  The picture actually makes my styling look good. (sorry for the low-quality, my camera battery needs recharging so I had to go with my ancient cell phone...)

It should have been Katelyn.  She is the one who's hair I was combing this morning thinking it was really time for a cut and style. However, she's never had her hair cut before, and I'm not so good with starting from scratch.  I figured Olivia was a safer choice considering the groundwork had already been laid for me.  Apparently I was wrong.  There is no safe choice when it comes to me cutting my children's hair.  With the right equipment (scissors, spray bottle, comb) I'm a danger to myself and those around me.  Actually just those around me.  I would NEVER attempt to cut my own hair.  It's just theirs that I like to ruin.

Guess that holiday picture I was hoping to capture in the next few weeks will have to wait.  Anyone know of any vitamins or supplements I can give this kid to make her hair grow faster? (maybe that eyelash growing stuff will do the trick?) I was really hoping to be early with the Christmas card this year...


marie said...

Step away from the scissors and stay away !!!!

Kathryn said...

Maybe she would like some headbangs, I mean headbands!!! ppppaaaaaaahhhhhhhh I am still LMAO!!! Maybe Christmas pictures with ski caps this year!!!

alyssa said...

Maybe this is the year you do an outdoor picture and you can wear hats :)

Anonymous said...

i actually was a stylist for 15 years before my RA got too bad. compared to the mom who thought that she could do a nice fade on her son with her husbands trimmer...i think you did fine.
we also had a mom try to use a colander(yes, for draining pasta and stuff) as a "cap" to highlight her daughters hair??!!
i fixed it but i swear i snickered like a candy bar for 3 months every time i made spaghetti.
she would look cute in a baby do-rag.


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